Holt adoptee and recent graduate Kathryn Turner shares what her relationship with her mom means to her.
It all started out as a choice. A choice of accepting it, or denying it. A choice where you have to think about what is best. Best for you and best for your child. The environment may not be suitable for the child. The lifestyle isn’t quite right. The government doesn’t accept. A choice where giving your child up is the best thing you can do for them. An action where one has to choose one thing over another.
I came to the United States when I was 2 years old. My mother carried me through the airport with tons of friends and family crowded around her. I was a shy baby who never wanted to let go or look at people straight in the eye. I held on to her for many weeks. Nothing could pry me off of her. And I mean nothing. Not even my favorite snack, Cheerios. I was a stubborn child right from the start.
Soon came the days where I would scrape my knee after falling off my bike and wanting my mom to kiss it, so it felt better. The nights where my mom would wash my hair and play with me. Waking up in the morning to her telling me it is time to get up and get ready for daycare, and then soon enough, school.
Then came the double digit/teen years. The most incredible, yet difficult years of my life so far. The years where you want your mom to kiss your paper cut on the crease of your pinky finger, but you’re a teenager now, it’s not cool to have your mommy kiss it. The years where independence controls your whole life and tells you whether you’re popular or not. The years where “Because I told you so” is mainly used and not accepted by the smart and always right teenager. The years where you will fall multiple times, but learn how to stand back up and get through it. The years where items are prioritized more than eating at the dinner table with your family.
Now that I am 18, and living with my mom and have become wise in many aspects of this society, I know my mom will always be there for me whether I am right or wrong. That she will kiss my wounds and aches. I still have much to learn, the ole wise one says, but I am ready to take on new obstacles that come in my way, all because of the wonderful woman that I call “Mom.” She adopted me and has ever since called me her daughter and her world. She did travel half way around the world to get me. She means everything to me, and I could not have asked for a more amazing mom than her. I appreciate everything she has done for me. You will always be my mother, and you have taken great care of me, and now it’s my time to take care of you. I have one thing for you adoptive parents out there: you are a miracle to your child’s life. You are their guardian and their leader. Mother, I have one thing to tell you also, and one thing I want you to always remember: ILYATWAB (I Love You Around The World And Back).
Kathryn Turner | Altoona, Iowa