A mom learns of the extraordinary kindness and generosity of Holt sponsors.
by Amy Lafler
My husband Barry and I started the adoption process for our first son, Evan, in July of 2007. We were matched with him in August of 2008 and brought him home in December of that year. Best Christmas present ever! Evan is a smart, handsome and thoughtful little boy who loves to build. We are positive that he will be building or designing something when he grows up. He started kindergarten this year, and is doing very well academically.
Shortly after we came home with Evan, we knew we wanted him to have a brother or sister and almost immediately began the adoption process again. We were matched with our twin daughters in March 2012 and traveled to Korea to bring them home that November. Kassandra and Addison complement each other very well, but are still developing their own interests. Kassi is very interested in anything her big brother is doing, and Addie loves to sing and dance. They have only been home for a year, so we are still seeing their personalities emerge.
During the wait for our girls, the rules changed in Korea. This gave adoptive parents a chance to connect to each other and support one another during the wait. Several Facebook groups were set up to encourage one another when the waiting days seemed endless. Additionally, it gave waiting families the opportunity to cheer for each other when one of us was finally united with our child. Today, we are all learning from each other, helping to raise our kiddos together and supporting each other through the journey of parenthood. We have such an amazing connection in our group. We just “get each other.”
It was in this group that I learned of Holt child sponsorship, and its connection to our family.
One day, an adoptive mom posted that she had recently learned that her daughter had been sponsored when she was in care. She mentioned that we could also contact Holt to see if our children had been sponsored as well. ‘We need to do this!’ I thought to myself. ‘We need to find out if our children were sponsored. We need to know if generous, caring people loved our children and hoped that they would one day have a forever family.’ For our son, I thought the possibility of sponsorship was a long shot. He came home to us at 9 months old. I, however, thought that it was a good possibility that our girls had been sponsored, as they were older when we picked them up.
After a quick e-mail detailing our kids’ information, we were notified that all three of our children had been sponsored! Our immediate response after finding out this information was ‘WOW!’ Someone HAD loved our children before we even knew they were ours! How amazing! What an awesome gift. Our next thought was: ‘How do we find them to tell them thank you!’
As we waited to hear back from Holt, I learned a bit more about Holt’s sponsorship program. I found out that most sponsors are never contacted by adoptive parents. A lot of Holt sponsors have sponsored children for years. Part of the adoption journey deals with loss, so any connections for our children are very significant in telling their story.
I figured that Evan’s sponsor had not seen him since he was 9 months old, so I went back in our archived photos and pulled a few old ones along with a few new ones so they could see him growing. The girls were a bit easier because they had only been home for a year. After I gathered several pictures and wrote a note thanking them for loving our children and helping to provide for them while we could not, I mailed them off to Holt.
We heard from two of the three sponsors right before the holidays, making the holiday just a little bit sweeter. One family was so excited to get
pictures and couldn’t wait to take them to show the extended family over the holidays. They had been sponsoring children for 25 years and we were the first family to contact them. They also had a Korean adopted daughter who was now in her 50’s. The second sponsor family shared the sweet story of one of her daughters wanting to adopt Kassandra very badly and was so excited to get pictures to see her again. Both families want to receive more updates as the kids grow and we are looking forward to growing a relationship with them.
The very thought of sponsors makes tears gather in my eyes. What a selfless act of pure love.
To the sponsors who gave so generously to our children, thank you! We are eternally grateful and are excited to have an everlasting relationship with you.
If you or your children are adopted through Holt, you can email [email protected] to find out whether you or your child had a sponsor while in care.
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I never thought to ask Holt if our son had a sponsor. Thanks for sharing your story. I do know of someone that sponsored a child after hearing our adoption story. I remember them telling me that their sponsor child was going to be adopted & they were very sad since they would no longer be able to continue. I think more families would likely follow in your footsteps. I think these sponsors are wonderful to care about these children.