The Joy of Thien!

Khavong Pha and Mang Vang recently adopted Thien, age 7, from Vietnam. Now each day with their son brings new firsts, new discoveries and lots of joy.

“I’m a superhero!”

It’s a warm spring day in California as Thien sits contentedly on his mother’s lap, wearing a bright blue t-shirt. It’s been roughly eight months since he arrived in the U.S. from his birth country of Vietnam, and each day is filled with new words and discoveries. Today, Thien is saying things like “Amazing!” and “I’m a superhero!”

Thien’s parents — Khavong Pha and Mang Vang — traveled to Vietnam in September 2025 to adopt Thien, who was 6 at the time. Having lived at the House of Love Catholic orphanage in southern Vietnam since he was 2 months old, Thien is still finding the world of Legos, Pokémon cards and scooters to be a novel experience. Being part of an extended family — living with his mom, dad and elderly grandfather — is new to him as well.

Starting the Adoption Journey

Khavong and Mang began their adoption journey five years ago when they initially hoped to adopt an infant from the U.S. But on two occasions, the adoptions did not move forward when, at the last minute, the birth mothers decided to parent their children. Shortly thereafter, Khavong and Mang contacted Holt and began to explore international adoption and the prospect of adopting an older child. “As first-time parents, we originally hoped to adopt a baby because we wanted to experience all the ‘firsts’ of raising a young child,” Khavong says. “But after some discussion with [the adoption team at] Holt, we expanded our range up to age 6.”

Khavong and Mang chose to adopt from Vietnam because of the program’s flexibility and the relatively short time it would take to complete the adoption. In all, it took two and a half years from the time the family submitted their application to the time they traveled to Vietnam. During the homestudy process and waiting period, Khavong and Mang participated in Holt’s online pre-adoption training, which focused on seven important aspects of adoption, trauma and child development, attachment styles, parenting tools such as conflict resolution, and accessing services and support. They also completed additional training geared toward parents planning to adopt an older child. This training focused on topics such as childhood experiences, cultural experiences by country and school transitions.

In addition, Khavong and Mang worked with an adoption finance coach, provided free of service by Holt, to secure grants that would offset the cost of their adoption. With the coach’s assistance, the family secured a $4,000 grant, which they used toward their travel expenses to Vietnam.

Heading to Vietnam!

In September 2025, Khavong and Mang set off on a two–week trip to Vietnam, which would forever change their lives. Before embarking on their travels, the couple spoke with Jessica Palmer, Holt’s director of intercountry adoption, and Smita Deshpande, Holt’s adoption case manager for Thailand and Vietnam, who reviewed with them the entire in-country process to prepare them for their trip. “Knowing what to expect in advance really helped us to de-stress so that we weren’t too worried about what was going to happen,” Khavong says.

Khavong and Mang also had the opportunity on two occasions to video chat with Thien and to send him a care package, which included photos of his new family. In fact, when Khavong and Mang had their first video call with Thien a few months before meeting him, he already referred to them as mom and dad.

Then on September 8, 2025, Khavong and Mang’s dream of becoming parents finally became a reality. On that morning, the couple traveled to the House of Love to meet Thien and the caregivers who had so lovingly cared for him. Upon seeing her son for the first time, Mang says, “It was so amazing. It almost didn’t seem real. It was such a happy feeling.”

While at the House of Love, Khavong and Mang toured the facility, learned more about their son — including his likes, dislikes, and eating and sleeping habits — and presented gifts to the more than 40 children living there. In Vietnam, children often come into orphanage care due to poverty or the stigma of having a child out of wedlock. Birth mothers can also approach an orphanage to sign relinquishment papers when they no longer are able to provide for their children.

It’s not clear as to why Thien was brought to the House of Love, but on the morning of September 9, 2025, Khavong and Mang officially became his parents during a Giving and Receiving ceremony held at the local Department of Justice. “Officially becoming parents, especially after battling infertility for so long, was an emotionally complex milestone,” says Khavong. “When Thien finally became our son, we were overwhelmed with gratitude and joy.”

A Family of Three

Upon becoming a family of three, Khavong, Mang and Thien traveled together to Hanoi to complete Thien’s medical assessments and attend a visa interview at the U.S. Embassy. Most importantly, the family used this time to learn about and bond with one another.

Initially, Thien and his parents had trouble communicating since they didn’t share a common language, so they relied on a translation app to bridge the gap. Khavong and Mang also needed to establish some routines around eating and sleeping schedules — and setting boundaries to keep Thien safe. As Khavong recalls, “Thien is an extrovert who gets along with everyone, so he would wander off to talk to people on his own. For that reason, we had to teach him to stay close to us!”

Khavong and Mang also had to explain the finer points of grocery shopping to their son. “When we went to the grocery store, we would pick up some small candies for Thien. But not realizing they were meant for him, Thien would grab some on his own. At first, he was upset when we asked him to put them back, but after a few visits to the store, Thien began to understand that the candies were not for us — but for him,” says Khavong.   

A New Life in California

While traveling in Vietnam, Khavong and Mang noticed that Thien was active and talkative but may have shown some signs of stress. Not having the words or language skills to express himself at age 6, Thien sometimes made small noises and scratched himself reflexively.

Then when the family reached the airport in California, Thien grew quiet as he took in all the new faces and sounds in his new environment. “It was all so overwhelming to him,” Khavong recalls. Thien also had a hard time accepting his new home when the family first arrived. He began to cry and said in Vietnamese, “This is not my house. I want to go home.”

What helped Thien settle down — and settle in — was the presence of his 88-year-old grandfather, who lives with the family and reminded Thien of one of the older caregivers at his orphanage. When Thien saw his grandpa, his face lit up and he immediately gave him a hug. From there, Thien chose to sleep with his grandfather for the first month or two, which also helped with his adjustment. While living at the orphanage, Thien typically shared a bed with a caregiver, which is common in many Asian cultures, so this arrangement seemed both familiar and comforting to him.   

Some six months later, Thien sleeps in his own room at night and spends his days with his parents, who own a small business. He seems to have no major medical or developmental issues, but Thien sometimes still shows a fear of abandonment. He tends to stay close to his parents at home and asks to accompany one of them if they run out to do a quick errand. But as time goes on, Thien is showing signs of feeling more secure. These days, he is starting to go into his room on his own to play with his toys or video games as long as he knows his parents are nearby. “He’s becoming braver!” says Khavong.

The Happiest Child

Because 7-year-old Thien is scheduled to start school in the fall, possibly in an ESL class, Khavong and Mang are helping him learn English. So far, he knows his ABCs, can count to 110 and do some simple math. Khavong and Mang are also helping their son socialize with other children. Since each parent has six siblings, and Mang’s family lives close by, Thien has the chance to play with lots of cousins his age.

In time, Khavong and Mang hope to further integrate their family into the large Vietnamese community in nearby Sacramento so that Thien can remain connected to his birth culture. But for now, Thien is enjoying the Vietnamese noodles his mother has learned to make — along with the spaghetti, chicken, cheeseburgers and fries he’s grown to love. “He’s not a picky eater as long as the food isn’t spicy,” says Mang. “No spicy!” Thien chimes in.

For their part, Khavong and Mang are learning more about their son every day and delighting in watching him grow. “What I love about Thien is that he’s so energetic and happy,” says Mang. “He’s already laughing and smiling as soon as he wakes up at 6:30 or 7 a.m.”

Thien is also very thoughtful, Khavong adds. “Though he may be more attached to me, he’s very protective of his mom.”

In May, Mang celebrated her first Mother’s Day and shared her feelings about that experience. “After years of navigating through infertility, I had given up hope of ever becoming a mother,” she says. “However, this Mother’s Day was truly memorable and bittersweet. I was actually out of town traveling with my sisters and mom when Thien surprised me with a heartfelt video call. Over the call, Thien excitedly said, ‘Mommy, guess what?’ then aimed the camera toward a bouquet of flowers. His smile, excitement and pure love filled my heart with the realization that he was the missing piece that I’ve been searching for — for so long.”