This is a hard choice! I will say that sometimes we look at it the wrong way. They aren't necessarily "losing" a name but gaining something new and distintive to his or her story line.
For those believers out there, we all know that God names and renames invdividuals in the bible for 2 reasons ( probably more but this is all I could think of): 1. The new name signifies his ownership and "claim" over their live. He is saying you are my child. Yes, our children are ours and naming them signifies that we are claiming a home and a life for them but we also want to paying respect to their past and their culture. 2. We also see God rename individuals to indicate an "overcoming" of sorts. Jacob went from being a deceiver to the father of many nations. Naming signified a maturing of faith, a passing on from one place to the next. And symbolically, Jacob crossed over the Jabbok river, not as Jacob but as Israel, holding to God promises.
When I struggled with what to do, I found much grace in those points above. It's ok to rename. Adoption is significant and to me i decided i wanted my kids to gain something new and precious from a new family and yet hold to the old as well. We chose new first names and retained Korean middle names. we plan to be respectful to our children's culture in many ways such as visits to Korea and such. So I decided I wouldn't feel guilty
. But I know the struggle!
Also, it was interesting for me to note that even many Korean american families here in the states give their children American names. My husband and I lived a while in Asia and its true even there, that kids were choosing to go by "American" names.
Last little thought.... My Korean friend said that in Korea many parents do name their kids for biblical characters. So, if you are a believer, you could choose a biblical name... Its basically said the same here and in korea
Sorry for the ramble
hope its helpful....