Other Mother wrote:Thanks all for the additional responses! We've been having a hard time with this. In the last couple days, he's added hitting himself on the head with his knuckles when he's admonished even slightly. And throwing in angry "Fine, I'm a bad boy!" statements. It's only been a few days since we've tried the ignoring, but it's really hard to ignore it. When we ignore it, he does just move on as if nothing happened onto the next topic.
I think I would be able to be playful with DS when he's like this, but it may be harder for DH, and it probably wouldn't help if his parents used different approaches... right?
As for time-outs, we do them close by - he can always see us, and if he's having a hard time, then we sit right next to him or put him in our laps.
Rockland, I will definitely be checking out all those resources! Thank you!!
Other Mother wrote: When we ignore it, he does just move on as if nothing happened onto the next topic.
One of the most typical features of the emotional make-up of a child with DTD is “hyper-arousal.” Dr. Bruce Perry (see http://www.childtrauma.org/), has shown that traumatic events have the capacity to change Central Nervous System of children the way that it stays in the aroused state much longer, and every perceived threat (real or imagined), reinforces the sensitized neuronal pathways for the heightened fear/stress response. Perceived threats can objectively be typical day-to-day events (new environment, a loud re-direction, disrupted routine, perceived rejection, etc.), thus regularly and negatively reinforcing this hyper-arousal state and causing an immature, aggressive, and socially inappropriate response to routine family events.
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