Our journey began three years ago when we decided to adopt from China. We had put off having children until we were in a position to provide a good home. Lisa’s sister , who had already started her China adoption process, shared her experience with us, and we felt like this was a good way for us to begin.

After six months of beginning to assemble a dossier for China, we became discouraged by the wait times and decided that adopting a child from Mongolia may be a better option.  After much time and expense, our agency sent our completed dossier to Mongolia. Many months passed without much information.  Then, one night, we were told that our agency would no longer be handling adoptions in Mongolia.

It was hard to describe how we felt at the time–stunned, depressed.

Three months later we realized that we still wanted to have a little girl, and our hearts were set on a toddler. We considered domestic adoption, investigated it with our social worker and came to the realization that we could adopt an infant, but there would be many unknowns.

After considering this for a time, we decided that we wanted to adopt a young girl with minor special needs from China. We were told that the wait times for these children are much shorter. After all of this time we had come full circle!  Deciding on the needs that we were willing to accept for our family was not easy. After much deliberation and investigation, we informed Holt that a child with bilateral or unilateral cleft lip and palate would be a good fit for our family.

Our referral came through in record time!  When we finally arrived in China, our guide took us to the Social Welfare office to meet Kate and have the “hand off”.  Of course we had seen many heart warming hand offs on the Internet, but ours was a little different.  Lisa and I were all tears of joy to meet “Chun-Chun” (pronounced Chew-in-Chew-in).  She, however, wanted nothing to do with us.  She wailed each time someone pointed to us and said “Ba-Ba, Ma-Ma”.  Finally, I took her in my lap and tried to console her.  She just went limp and wailed at the ceiling.

The next two weeks really put Lisa and me to the test.  There were many tears, and we felt really inadequate…but I’d do it all again in a heartbeat.

Today Kate is a vivacious three-year-old.  She gives us hugs and kisses, whispers very important things in our ears, swims like a fish, and surprises us with entire sentences in English.  She has to watch “Cinderella” every day and tells me: “No, that’s not a monkey in the mirror.  That’s Kate!”

Follow Gary and Lisa’s journey to Kate on their “Coming Home with Kate” blog

By Gary and Lisa Falkenberg

A family’s faith-filled answer to a common adoption question

Almost three years ago when our baby boy was born in China’s Hunan Province, his parents-to-be hadn’t even started their adoption journey. When our son was celebrating his first birthday with his loving foster family, we were putting the final touches on our home study. We had answered so many questions along the way. Which country? What age? Then, as our social worker met with us for our home visit, she asked us the strangest question: Which gender?

As a childless couple who would joyfully have accepted any child at any point in our marriage, the question took us aback. The answer was obvious. We were open to either a boy or a girl. We didn’t choose China because we wanted a daughter. Our reasons were varied. We were going to China because the Chinese adoption program was straightforward and established—and because of the China Child of Promise (CCOP) option. We were immediately drawn to a program that would match us fairly quickly with a child who had minor, manageable medical needs. A CCOP mom told me their medical conditions checklist had “a lot of no’s,” indicating that they weren’t willing to accept many medical conditions, but they were still matched swiftly and successfully with their son. Beth Smith, Holt’s China director of services, inspired confidence. And, to be honest, we had a gut feeling that our child was in China.

We were right.

Just days after our agency sent our home study to Holt, we got a call. A referral? Already? We were shocked—and ecstatic. It was a boy! He was 13 months old, his special need seemed to have been addressed, he was in foster care, and he was the most beautiful child we had ever seen.

We couldn’t wait to share our news—and our families and friends were overjoyed. We were so caught up in the whirlwind of being newly expectant parents that we were surprised when people started asking, “A boy? I thought China only had girls for adoption.” Swallowing the urge to say, “Don’t you just want to see his photo again?” we explained that many boys in China—especially those with special needs—need loving families. When a family’s entire livelihood depends on having a son who will grow into adulthood, and when medical care is not available or affordable, birth families need to make what must be a heartbreaking decision about whether to raise children with medical concerns. The doctor who reviewed Louis’s file had no worries about our referral, but he also knew that any question marks could most likely be addressed in our hometown, which offers some of the best medical care in the country.

As it turns out, Louis has no special needs by American standards. He has a ravenous appetite, an insatiable interest in vehicles, a passion for singing the ABC’s, and a sweet, affectionate heart. His pediatrician couldn’t be happier with his growth and development. We couldn’t be more enthralled with his personality and his charming—and sometimes mischievous—smile.

Since Louis came home, our responses to the questions about how we came to be the parents of a boy from China have changed. When we landed in Chicago just before Christmas, our son’s understanding of English was minimal and we could be as informative as we wanted to be in our replies. Six weeks later we realized he understood almost everything we said. Eight months later we can easily envision a day when he will be able to answer the questions himself. So our answers to “How did you ever get a boy from China?” become more important for our listening son than the people asking.

Typically we smile and say something like “Aren’t we so lucky!” and talk about how perfectly Louis fits into our family. Louis and his Baba (Dad) have the same perfectionist streak, sense of humor, and enthusiasm for trains. He and his Mama love to cook and sing together. He enjoys reading and going to the library even more than his bookworm parents do. And he proudly reminds us to say grace and says “Amen” loudly at all the right moments at church.

When Louis isn’t with us, or if we get a sense that the person asking might feel tugged toward adoption, we take the time to explain that many boys in China are waiting for families. Still, Louis isn’t a statistic, a spokesperson, or a representation of the changing population in orphanages and foster care. He is our son.

How did we ever adopt a boy who has wiggled his way so surely into our hearts and lives? Only God knows. And we thank Him every day that when we were asked “Which gender?” we shrugged our shoulders and said we’ll let God decide. We could never have picked for ourselves so perfectly.

A few weeks after bringing Louis home, my husband was giving Louis a bath. Amidst the splashing and the laughter, John turned to me and said, “OK, when do you want to go back to China for another child?” That trip won’t happen as soon as we’d like, but it isn’t far off. And when we sat down with our social worker to start the home study for Louis’s sibling, she asked us the same question about gender. We gave her the same answer as before—no preference. “You know you’ll most likely be matched with a boy,” she reminded us.

That’s in God’s hands, we said. And what a blessing that child—our son or daughter—will be.

–Rita and John Buettner

Interested in the China Child of Promise option? Click here to learn more…

by Sue Smith

Soon after Tony and I were married, we found out that it would be difficult for us to have biological children. Tony wanted to look into adoption. I, however, wanted to try for biological children. We tried IVF with donated eggs…twice. No luck.

Eventually, we decided that we really just wanted to be parents. First we looked into domestic adoption, received an approved home study and waited. Three years (and no requests to meet us) later, we decided to look into international adoption. We attended an information meeting held by our local agency, and after reading about the various country programs, and talking to friends who adopted from China, we decided China was the country for us.

During the paperwork process, we kept hearing about (and being reminded about) the lengthening wait times for a child in the standard process. In our mid-40s, we knew that we would not be able to wait the 3 or 4 years after our dossier arrived in China for a referral. That’s when we decided to look into adopting a child with special needs. We knew, however, that we wanted a child as healthy as possible, rather than one with a more acute medical condition.

Soon after we were logged-in, (October 2008), we sat in on Holt’s China Child of Promise (CCOP) webinar to learn more about the program and process. Because a referral through this program was a much faster process, and the children available were more within our comfort zone, we felt that this program was a good fit for us. We viewed the minor/correctable needs checklist and did some research on the conditions. In November 2008, we sent in our checklist, and had a daughter six days later! Tony said: “I knew the wait was shorter, but I figured it would be six months, not six DAYS!”

A little over four months later, we met Meighan and have been home for a year. It was a “match made in heaven,” and we couldn’t be happier. Meighan was born with a very minor cleft lip, repaired when she was 6 months old. Now, at 2 ½, she has very good fine and gross motor skills, smiles and laughs readily, loves to run, blow bubbles, be tickled, and do just about anything outside. She also loves music and dancing.

As far as her lip goes, doctors say it’s a good repair, and I doubt she’ll need more work on it.  Meighan came to us as a “special needs” child, but she’s as healthy as any kid.

Children with correctable, manageable conditions are waiting for families in China right now. Holt’s China program matches these children with families very quickly.  Join Holt’s China Child of Promise Webinar to learn more about this expedited process and the beautiful children in this program.

Click here to view the minor/correctable conditions checklist

The story of a little girl with vision problems and the journey of faith her family walked to bring her home

by Jennifer Smith

After the birth of our third child in 2003, we decided that our family was complete. We were content and didn’t plan to have any more children; however, God had other plans. During the summer of 2006 we began to think about adding to our family, discussed adoption and prayed for God’s guidance. We both felt a tugging towards adoption, but we wanted to make sure it was the right path for our family.  We were looking for some sort of big sign, and we got exactly that when we attended Winter Jam in 2007 in Mobile. It was our first time to attend a Winter Jam concert, so imagine our surprise when we discovered that Holt International sponsored it. As a video presentation of orphanages in China played, we watched as tears rolled down our cheeks. When it was over, we looked at each other and said: “We’re adopting. We’re going to China.”  We requested an application packet from Holt the next week.

Like most people, we experienced both miracles and challenges during our adoption journey, but we just forged ahead and claimed 2 Corinthians 5:7 as our adoption verse. It states: “For we walk by faith, not by sight.” That verse came to mean so much to us during both the joyful and difficult times of our adoption journey.

We started out in the standard process but then expanded our options to include China Child of Promise.  After only a few weeks in this program, we received our referral for a beautiful little girl named Shang Nan. She was listed as having vision problems. We read over the information and looked at her pictures, and we knew that she was the one. We fell in love with her instantly.

Rinnah Shangnan is doing very well now. She’s had an eye examination, and it was confirmed that she is completely blind in her right eye. She wears glasses now, and we can tell that using them is definitely helping her.  She is trying to stand up now and even does somersaults! She is a good-natured and happy little girl.

Before we met Rinnah Shangnan, we anticipated that attachment would be her biggest challenge; however, she has attached and bonded remarkably well. Now our biggest challenge is helping her with the vision problem and developmental delays. She has regularly scheduled appointments with a vision therapist, as well as both a physical and an occupational therapist. Rinnah Shangnan has made a great deal of progress already, but we’ve still got a long way to go.

To those of you in process now, just remember that waiting provides you the opportunity to grow and to prepare for the changes and the challenges ahead. Even then, you will experience surprises along the way. Some things you just can’t prepare for, but when you hold your child for the first time, the difficulty of waiting just fades away. The love that you feel is indescribable. We are so blessed to have Rinnah Shangan in our family, and we continue our journey – walking by faith each day.

Learn more about the China Child of Promise option….

Joys and challenges the first year home

by Cris Nelson

One year since God brought a beautiful little girl into our lives. In some ways, it has been more difficult than I ever thought it would be, but it has also been just as rewarding. Here is our story….

The Story of Jing Jing: On a cold January day in 2007, a police officer walked his beat in the Chinese province of Shaanxi and came across a basket on a bridge. Inside the basket he found a little girl with a cleft lip and palate. Given the cold weather conditions, you could rightly assume that if the police officer had discovered the baby even an hour later, the baby probably would not have survived. It is not a coincidence, we believe, that the officer happened to be walking by at just the right moment.

An adoption missionary at our church once talked about taking a child dealt a bad hand and putting some “aces” in their hand. Kelly and I knew that was what we wanted to do. Bringing an orphaned child with a medical need to the United States is like a miracle for them, and we are humbled by the opportunity to love her. We named her Hope, because of the hope she has for a new life, and because of our family’s hope in Christ Jesus. (Hebrews 11:1)

We Loved China: Our family absolutely loved China! The Chinese people were so wonderful to us, and experiencing one of the oldest cultures in the world was truly amazing.  Most importantly, we wanted to see and understand the culture of our new family.

Difficult….at first: The first months home were really difficult. Hope had been moved around and had developed severe separation anxiety. In her 2-year-old mind, her caregivers had abandoned her. Hope bonded with Kelly right away, so that was the good news. The bad news was that Hope had complete emotional meltdowns if separated from Kelly for even a moment. This made it really hard for Kelly to accomplish simple things like showering or even sleeping. Hope would wake up every hour to check if Kelly was still there. Once Kelly reassured Hope that she wasn’t going anywhere, Hope would go back to sleep. Fortunately, Kelly was up to the challenge and really gave herself unselfishly to Hope during this difficult time.

Phobias: Hope came to us with a number of fears and phobias. At first we were amazed that she could eat more than our three other children combined, which is especially puzzling given that she has an open cleft palate. We learned that many orphaned children are prone to overeating. For the first six months, Hope couldn’t sleep unless we fed her before bedtime and had food by her bed.

Fast Forward: While we were waiting for Hope to come home, we received reports from China stating that Hope didn’t like to smile or play with other children. None of the photos we received had Hope smiling. This kind of worried us. But fast forward one year, and Hope is like a different person. She grows more confident each day, and smiles and laughs all the time.

Surgery: Hope underwent cleft palate surgery in September. Due to her fears of starvation, she had a really tough time being on the liquid diet required and lapsed back into her old behavior. Once she got back to solid foods she snapped out of it. She will have a few more surgeries in the next few years and will need a lot of speech therapy. She will have some speech delays, but we are confident she will get caught up. Hope shows improvement every day.

New Creation: Seeing Hope laugh and play with our three other children: Hannah, Thomas and Rachel, we are humbled to think about how Hope’s life has changed. She has blossomed in the past year and is no longer the child who would not smile or play with other children. One of my favorite bible verse passages is when Jesus says: “Behold, I make all things new.” God is, in fact, making a new creation of our little girl! And in the end, the love we give is surpassed by the love we receive!

Happy One-Year Anniversary!

Dear Holt China Families:

Last year Holt matched many children with families through the China Child of Promise option, and many of these families are already home and in process for another child from China!

Although this program has proven to be a huge success, many children are still waiting, and we don’t have enough families joining this option.

If you know anyone who may consider opening their homes and hearts to a child with a minor to moderate, treatable medical condition such as cleft/lip palate, minor heart conditions, or adopting a boy with a minor condition, please inform them about this program.

Joining this program does not exclude you from the standard waiting process; it simply expands your options and gives you the chance to be matched with a child much quicker.

If you are waiting exclusively in the standard process, you might join one of our Webinars to learn more about the children available through the Child of Promise option. Also, take a look at Holt’s minor/correctable conditions checklist of conditions, which you can fill out at any time, checking the boxes of the conditions you feel are within your capacity.

This year many families who were waiting in the standard process have found the China Child of Promise option to be very gratifying! You can see the benefits of this program by reading the China Child of Promise family stories below and viewing the online photo gallery of the children who have been matched with families.

I never really thought about having a wife, home and children when I was younger. In the back of my mind I thought it might be possible but, at the time, it just wasn’t a priority for me. I was too busy with college, playing in a rock band and thinking mostly of myself….there had to be something more. I knew there was a greater calling. Today, I am the father of eight precious children….

I married a wonderful woman and had three handsome, smart and thoughtful sons who were truly blessings from heaven. We started attending a local church, and we both accepted the Lord and put our trust in Him. Thus began the tale of the adoption of our daughters from China who needed homes of their own…. We adopted Faith, Hope, Grace, Joy and most recently Jewel, who was 13 when she came home to us. We have had very similar, yet distinct, experiences early on with each of our children.

When we traveled to receive Faith, who was 15 months old at the time, I had no idea what to expect. When the caregivers brought her out, she cried and cried and continued to stay in a glazed state for several days. My wife and I often prayed for guidance in this matter and to help our daughters adjust, we eventually quit our jobs and moved to the mountains where we worked from home and were able to spend more quality time with our children.

We felt called to look into adopting another child from China and adopted Hope when she was five years old. Her room at the orphanage was eight by five feet, with a small bed on the cement floor and a Red Cross blanket. That was all there was. The workers do wonders with what they have and truly have a heart to help children, but they just don’t have enough resources. Continue Reading »

We wanted to add another son to our family and, through Holt’s Child of Promise program, we brought Will home just one year and one day after we signed the papers to begin our home study!

When we started to discuss adding a final child to our family, we realized that we had several prerequisites that made it challenging to locate a program that fit all of them. We wanted a son–that was the easy one. We also wanted our child to come home at under 2 years old, and the clincher was that we wanted him to be about 18 months younger than our youngest child at the time. This meant that we would need to complete an adoption in about a year. How in the world could this happen when adoption time-lines are increasing in so many programs?

Answer: Holt’s Child of Promise program. After talking to Holt’s China staff, we became very excited about the potential addition to our family of a child with a minor to moderate need. When a staff member asked me if we were open to either gender, my heart sank….”No, we are only open to a son,” I replied. The excitement and joy in his voice reassured me immediately as he exclaimed, “Really? You want a son? This is great! We have so many boys that need families! Your referral will come very quickly!”

Let me jump to the present! Will is such an amazing little guy! He makes us laugh each day as he imitates what we do, runs around the house after his siblings, and tries to say new words. His smile and giggle bring joy to each of our hearts. He fits right into our family, and although he has only been home for seven weeks, it feels like he has been with us from the start.

If you are frustrated by waiting in the China standard program or contemplating adding another child to your family, I urge you to download the “Minor/Correctable conditions” checklist from Holt’s website and take it to a pediatrician to review. We were very surprised to learn how many children that would be considered “healthy” by American standards are waiting for families in the “minor/correctable needs” program in China. In our situation, our pediatrician thinks that the hole in Will’s heart that labeled him “special needs” healed before the adoption was completed. Holt’s China Child of Promise program was the best decision we could have made…it brought us our amazing son!

by: Elizabeth

My wife Cheryl and I adopted our sons, Alexander and Benjamin, from South Korea, and in 2006 we decided to adopt through Holt International’s China program.

Cheryl had wanted to adopt a daughter from China since at least 2004, and she had an ally in our daughter, Leah, who had been praying for a little sister for quite some time. They finally got me onboard, and we got started on the long road of adoption again. When we received and scanned over the big red book that explained Holt’s China adoption process we were a little overwhelmed. Adopting from China looked a lot more difficult than adopting from Korea.

We started in the standard China program but also decided to be in the Waiting Child program simultaneously. It proved to be a good choice. If we had only been in the standard program, we would still be waiting (possibly years) longer for just a child referral. So our road wasn’t as long as it might have been.

We traveled to China to receive Jenna in 2007 when she was 3 years old. Born with a cleft palate and large birthmark on the right side of her face and neck, Jenna had been abandoned in Shennong Park when she was 1 month old. The cleft palate had already been surgically repaired in China before we received her.

Soon after we brought Jenna home we took her to see several specialists at the University of Iowa Otolaryngology department where they checked her repaired cleft palate, speech and hearing. They determined that she had ear infections and that her hearing was damaged possibly from the frequency of these infections throughout her young life. They recommended at least a couple of hours a week of speech therapy with a specialist.

In the time since, Jenna has had 1 – 2 hours each week of speech therapy. Jenna is on her 3rd set of ear tubes, which have eliminated her ear infections and helped somewhat with her speech. Her speech therapist once demonstrated to me how Jenna’s soft palate doesn’t have the normal range of motion that a normal one has. As a result it takes Jenna more effort to make certain sounds and she tends to speak nasally due to air leakage out of her nostrils. Jenna may require more palate surgery soon, but in the meantime we are continuing with her speech therapy.

Cheryl and I absolutely adore Jenna. She is so full of joy and love. Jenna is very sweet and generous. She loves to play, have fun and laugh and we just know that she loves to be a part of our family. We thank God each day that we get the privilege of being her parents.

Each child that we have adopted from Holt’s Waiting Child program has enriched our family beyond measure. I would highly recommend adopting a child through Holt’s Child of Promise program or Waiting Child program. The Holt China program helped match us with the child who was right for our family, and they helped us through the whole process every step of the way – through all the paperwork, with our dossier, throughout our wonderful experience of traveling to China to receive our daughter, and with our post-placement obligations.

Going through such an adoption process seemed overwhelming at the start, but we just did it step by step. No one step was too difficult. Eventually all of the steps are complete and looking back it doesn’t seem so hard after all. The reward is a precious, beautiful gift from God who loves us as much as we love her.

By Brett Foley

A family is completed through the China  Child of Promise program

by Kim Esser

My husband and I went to an informational meeting on adoption in our hometown in 2006. We have three wonderful kids but were open to adding to the family through adoption. After the meeting we immediately started in on the paperwork.

As the one-year anniversary of our log-in date approached we saw the wait time increase triple fold. What were we to do? Stay in the process? Drop out? Switch to special needs?

In the end, we decided to go the China Child of Promise route. My husband and I filled out a minor/correctable needs checklist and then compared our lists, deciding on needs that we thought we could handle. We filed the paperwork in late August 2008 and three weeks later we had our referral! She was a beautiful little girl, about to turn one that week, and she was missing some fingers on her left hand…that was it!

We immediately said, “Yes! This is our child!” and started the process to bring Seren SuPing home. It seemed like everything then took the long route but in reality we were on our way to China in February 2009 to bring home our girl!

Seren SuPing has added so much joy to our family,and we can’t imagine life without her. If you are a family trying to decide if the Child of Promise program is right for you, take that leap of faith. In reality, you are the ones in control because you decide what “special needs” you are open to. There was never any pressure from Holt, and they never tried to persuade us into needs that we weren’t open to.

Holt wants you to feel comfortable with what you decide upon and only wants what is best for the children. I look at our new daughter and can’t imagine not having her. She fits our family perfectly and has made us all appreciate what we have and what we do as a family.